MEMORIES (April 6, 2008)
Go ahead wtih the curb-stomp:
The cuts will heal
The blood will wash away
The time will pass.
We'll just hvae those sweet moments to look back on.
Sweet moments of you laughing:
Laughing at the blood
Laughing at the pain
And we'll remember tenderly.
Can't leave it alone
Can't forget any second
Nor leave the memory behind
As you remind me, taunt me, acost me.
Them sweet memories, sweet as can be, running around, playing tricks on me.
I CAN'T (April 6, 2008)
Memories of you.
Talking with you
Laughing with you;
At you as well.
Wishing for more,
Wanting to ask for more.
But not wanting rejection:
The expected outcome.
I want to ask you
Tell you
Show you.
But I can't
So I live on in memories
Conversations
Old jokes.
What I want I can't have
Nor could I ask for.
Simply because I can't.
Because you'll say no.
You'll leave
And then all I'll ever have
Is a memory
A conversation
And an old joke.
ALL I HAVE TO SAY (April 6, 2008)
I'm running out of different things to say, so I say the same things again and again. But what I say is real, so that's all that really matters. I want to beat it into your head, without the words leaving my mouth. I want you to know and I want you to see. Acknowledge. Understand. And maybe, if such a thing is possible, for you to want some of the same. I know its unlikely, I know its lame, and probably not anyting close to something you want. Which is why I can't say it. No matter how badly I want it, I know I can't . Because I can't. But I can't find anything else to say. It's just the same things again and again and again. But doesn't that show you something? Can't you see without all of this? I hope so, I'm just not sure. MissIinsecure, as we all know. As I'm sure you know. What I don't understand is how I got here. I have no idea. I've never been here before. I never wanted to be here. I was supposed to be good. Taken. Madly in love. And I had it. Until it was all ripped away, thrown out the window, left alone to waste. Now I have nothing, isnt this clear? And you can rescue me from that. I wish you would. You could help make things better. I would be there and could never hurt you. Never. Because I would never want to; unless you were an asshole, but I don't think you could be. No, I would be your girl, always there for you, behind you in most things (maybe not all, but I doubt that), and waiting to cheer you up or make you feel better. I would do it in a hearbeat, faster than that. All I need is the chance. The chance to prove it, do it, and show you that I mean business. Because I do. And I want to share it with you. Share all of it with you. Spend all the time in the Universe with you. Talk with you endlessly. Hug and kiss you constantly. And still be yours and yours alone. I say it over and over, but thats because that's all I want to say, all I have to say.
And yes, those are not my own pictures, they are from Yahoo! Messenger. The smiley is a smiley, and the huge lips are from an IMVironment, I'm pretty sure is called "Falling Hearts."